I won’t tell, if you wont tell
I’m trying to keep it on the low
Cause if he finds out and she finds out
You know it’s gonna end for sure
Its gonna end for sure baby
Even though you got a man (man)
And even though I got a girl (girl)
It is what it’s gonna be (I ain’t trippin’)
I like the way it’s going down
__________
always on my mind, always smooth.
woke up. deduced dad’s RATHER kan-cheong when taking public transport. met the parents at shunfu mart. was cramping. had breakfast. took the 167, arrived early and walked to tanjong pagar mrt. tried to pay my $52 bus-only concession. couldnt. seriously. wtf. i NEED to remember to tap when getting off the bus now. right. and i didnt on the way home. work-nothing til simon gave me this proposal…it’s currently half-done. lunch was charsiewfun!!! 
YEAH!!!! i really, really like it! work. dark chocolate. 167. 54. home. dinner. i miss my tail.
oh this is the clearest one i have of my tail..this was on the way to HK in 2006 by the way..
___________
Sabes que eres todo lo que quiero
que eres dueño de mi corazon
como si eres tu mi mundo entero
puedes hoy marcharte sin razon.
yesterday’s riding..the capitano man came to take pics..we were all in the poloT..haha, i think daniel’s more used to me in the nike dri-fits..anyway..here’s our version..after riding..
disclaimer: we are not a polo team, neither are we trying to be one..were just having fun with our new shirts! 
(L-R) yingjie (lil bro AKA bullet, bulletproof), me (AKA italiano), victoria (AKA ms singapore), ursula (urs, the nazi AKA ooo-ah)
–> Edit: im in short boots..and, okay, so is victoria..BUT i figure i need chaps. and i need to do something about my boots..their filthy please.
a certain person was around (freakye memories for urs and i…inside joke)..and ….*looks around for victoria*
____________
dinner with sylvia..
____________
and so…today was a good day..BUT i hate being a girl. wtf.
thanks here is due to ethel..for helping me with everything today..
image heavy…
this was our first look, before getting tix..yes, from the ground…165 meters is the highest point of i think..
and so it began with the ticket queuing..hahaha..
here’s more…still on the ground…
and GUESS WHAT? we thought we were going to fly out of singapore or something, hhahaa! they really took the security really seriously! i mean think about it, we can’t afford our newest attraction getting bombed to bits even BEFORE it’s official opening no?
here we are!
and i think this was the closest to a nice picture…hahahha..i just like the sky in this one..
oh, okay, this one’s nicer…
here’s EVERYONE!
and i sneaked on them both… =)
and yes, i become really cam-trigger happy when it’s scenic..i like taking photos you know? okay, i prefer to take photos of other people/stuff than me, but yeah..
i found this cool cos i got a fun reflection!
and this is a small part of the singapore flyer structure..
and we rushed these on the way down, hahahaha!!!
this is the singapore flyer complex with restaurants and stuff..
so…everyone had their faces painted but me! hahaha…roight..
we had popeye’s chicken for dinner..i like popeye’s chicken..but then i think the outlet at the airport is nicer..it’s quieter..and this one was really big!
we also so this Kenko Fish Spa..omg..there are these fish tanks..and you sit on the side and stick your tinky-toes in and let these fish err…nibble the toe jam off them…err. sorry, but i find this VERY weird..and i hardly think these fish would grow up healthy…FREAKY please..i think it’s animal abuse..AND i think fish nibbles are ticklish. and im afraid of fish. errrm, okay, these aren’t like meter-long fishies..but their these cute lil i dunno, baby fish, fishlets? hahhahahaa! and their just happily, unkowingly feeding on toe/foot-jam…EWWWW..
im meeting sylvia for dinner! yes…we’ve been meaning to meet for a godawfully long time..hahaha!
i had this GREAT mango juice at lunch time! WOW! k, i was really stuffed after that but yeah…i think im quite a chomper sometimes..
i told the folk at lunch about incident 1 from yesterday’s post and yes. some people are just weird, beyond belief sometimes. so erika, chill. and i think carol was right. the temperature was QUITE high at the lunch table today..
err..im back to ribboning…need i say more?
here is something interesting, it’s a TSHIRT store online and it’s quite entertaining! TorsoPants oh, wait, here’s another place!! disclaimer: this is a humor/satire site, not meant to offend anyone. all in good natured fun okay? i am in no way being racist here, so all you white people, dont freak out, you might even think it’s funny! hahaha! Stuff White People Like.
i’ve been educating myself at work too! Time, Newsweek and the Economist Online. i tried the print edition of the economist, i think i mentioned i almost died of boredom. i’ve really been trying to educate myself okay? i find Time quite interesting and of course! there’s The Onion!
tomorrow, imma be doing something quite interesting..ethel and i are going with ‘manda and family for Singapore Flyer! it’s not that im REALLY hard up on going or that i’ve been desperately wanting to go..it’s one of those things you’s just think ‘ahyah, another lame expensive attraction’ and not even think of going on it.. but since i was offered, i gladly accepted and now i’ll just see what good comes out of it.. PLUS im going with good friends!
i’ve just got my grad ceremony invite from NP…err, im abit confused with it..but yeah…all us graduates…hahaha..
sorry, the previous post is for yesterday. i forgot to hit ‘publish’ before i went to bed.
________
i dont think i saw a very pleasant side of anyone today after 2pm. my day in the office was uneventful, besides getting to know betty and ruby better (the attachment folk duo from NYP).. yeah. the drama started officially just before we left the office for a pre-departure briefing elsewhere.
1.
honestly, anyone can talk to my supervisors/colleagues about me if you really think it’s worth your time and if you have a valid point to make. if it were about the way i am, i welcome feedback so i can do things better: this works out for me in the long run- it can make me more efficient and help me understand the other side better, both of which are welcome. i welcome praise because it gives me assurance and i welcome complains- i will try to be gracious about it and see how maybe i could tweak my work processes.
people who know me know that i can be stubborn and opinionated, even to the point of being rude. HOWEVER, if someone can correct me and make me see an alternative that is valid and that makes more sense, i can and i WILL make ammendments. if i was obstinate previously, i will apologize without question and follow-through with the new idea. people also know that when it’s something im not familiar with, i will come right out and say ‘i dont know’, instead of trying to make up something. in this circumstance, i can’t do anything because i think there was really nothing wrong with what i did, or at least if there was, i can’t see it.
if i have a list of people to call, i dont exactly remember every call i make and what i say. all i know is that i respond as best i can given the circumstances and the information i have at that point in time. if i had to check on something, i think im competent enough to find out and return your call with the information requested.
what i do not understand is why people have to speak to supervisors if (as far as i can see, there was no problem at all). of course, from the outside looking in, im being petty and seriously erika, it’s a small issue. but really, if you were in my position for real, what would you feel? why does my supervisor have to be told about things that go on with me and another person over the phone? this same person even tells my supervisor that he/she told me off over the phone earlier.
here, i think i was polite for the duration of my few calls with this person. i will admit that i was insistent about the information i was trying to give but i think that IS part of my job. at no time during this call was it indicated that this person was busy, because when he/she previously was busy, i offered to call back. i hear from this supervisor that i am accused of being insistent about the information i was supposed to give, completely ignoring the fact that he/she was busy.
on a side note, between yesterday and today, i’ve been told off more than 5 times by different people (by the way, save for ONE particular case, i hardly think it was my problem). so please, be specific. also, i think that my colleagues/supervisors are great people who help me alot and are very patient.
2.
when people rush and are kiasu while being slightly ignorant, they are rude beyond belief.
3.
i think i meet the weirdest people.
note: in case people didnt know, i am all F-E-M-A-L-E, despite the fact that i look abit like a boy/andro at times. i do find it fun looking abit andro sometimes but i dont put ALOT of effort into it. i also do not think i am extremely good-looking. i just wear what i like to wear and sometimes it just turns out that i look abit like a boy.
i’d just want the world to know that no matter WHAT i look like and/or what i wear: a) i am and always will be eriKa, b) for all you freaks, i am not transgendered and c) i dont want to be randomly picked up.
so to the certain lady today…i dont want you to take me shopping and/or be your shopping partner, please do not attempt to touch my hair/fringe and tell me it’s nice (i really think my hair wasnt nice today), thank you for telling me ‘im your type’ but i dont think you’re mine and im not a ‘pretty boy’ (plus i dont think you even knew i was a girl, if you did know and you still did what you did, then you’re weirder than i thought). basically, no, i dont want to ‘hang out’. from everything you said (stated above and more), im assuming youre lonely and/or you want some sort of toy/escort/male company that looks a certain way. im not the sort and err, i think you should get some help..or some friends.. and no, im not sorry i rejected your offers.
________
on my own, pretending he’s beside me, all alone, i walk with him til morning. without him i feel his arms around me. and when i lose my way, i close my eyes and he has found me. in the rain, the pavement shines like silver. all the lights are misty in the river. in the darkness, the trees are full of starlight, and all I see is him and me for ever and forever. and i know it’s only in my mind that im talking to myself and not to him and although i know that he is blind, still i say there’s a way for us. i love him but when the night is over, he is gone, the river’s just a river, without him the world around me changes, the trees are bear and everywhere, the streets are full of strangers. i love him but everyday im learning all my life i’ve only been pretending. without me, this world would go on turning. a world that’s full of happiness that i have never known. i love him, i love him but only on my own.
-’on my own’ by eponine on les miserables
im fucking pissed with the neuromonics. or maybe it’s my being unthinking about it all, while trying to be practical. now, i cant wear it in the office cos the volume’s at minimum and is ‘not therapeutic’. therefore, i must wear it on the way to work, lunch and on the way home from work. wtf. seriously. it’s fucking up my life’s pattern. and i only have 4 tracks on the device. im not saying i want to discontinue, but MAYBE if i had more hours in a day and i dint have tinnitus to start with, this would all be better. i’m willing to try if it may help my tinnitus, but it seems to be so troublesome to keep on with this treatment.
and then i had a small ‘questioning’ at my review session today on ‘how come i didnt wear the device on the 27th of march’. okay. I LEFT IT IN THE OFFICE. period. dammit. omg.
and then im feeling REALLY pressured about this thing cos the damage is 6000 bucks. so i cannot drop it/spoil it and i must use it everyday without fail for at least 2 hours. and it’s really freaky cos the thing tracks what time i wear it, on what date and at what volume. wah lao. i dont even know what to feel la. the guy said..’what about lunch time?’ and i just kept quiet. i mean seriously, do i NOT have some sort of social life?
and the thing about the contraption is that the buttons can’t lock. and i can’t set a constant vol, so every time i switch on, i’ve to think so much. the volume must be above minimum, comparable to my tinnitus and not drowning it out..
who says my my ipod music is better, NO, i’d much rather listen to the neuromonics. who said i like hiphop better than the zen-nish stuff playing on the device? who said it’s pressurizing? no, it’s not, only compulsory 2 hours per day, every single day. who says i feel pressured? who says i don’t like concentrating on setting the volume, ’setting and forgetting’ is VERY easy, what? just press the + button and set it EVERY time you wear it! it’s okay!
__________
my morning was basically screwed. my ipod ran out of battery. erika without an mp3 player is like a mental cripple or something. i’ve grown so dependant on it. so i did neuromonics. roight. roight.
work however was uneventful..just tickets. and more tickets. and then i had to make some calls and stuff. so i lunch-ed with claudia. there was extra food from some airline briefing, i think..so we had this packet of nasi lemak-ish stuff. BUT, with beehoon. it was good! delivered from lee wee brothers or something. i lunch-ed with claudia in the pantry and then ruby and betty joined us. we were chatting about their time in Ho Chi Minh mostly..hahaha! quite interesting finding out from first-timers and from many-timer-claudia, hahhaaha! and no, Tour Leaders/Managers dont exactly have a GREAT, LUXURIOUS job. yes, they travel, but nah, it’s not your average holiday…
i made more calls. i spoke to this really nice lady. very refreshing to speak to someone pleasant on the phone. someone genuinely interested in what you have to say, makes conversation and asks intelligent, calculated questions. im glad i spoke to her. it made my day.
of course there was this lady. i spoke to her, overheard her side-conversation with her friends/colleagues, heard her friends/colleagues multiple conversations, spoke to her secretary, called her secretary back and got scolded by her secretary. okay. i’ve never been a secretary, corporate/personal assistant and so i’ll never know what it’s like. but isn’t it a general skill for everyone to have - to be polite? especially for secretaries, since they’re kinda like agents for their bosses/employers? SHEESH man. okay. i speak quickly, but really, i genuinely want to help you, so don’t yell at me for stuff that’s not my fault, it kills my morale. i can shrug alot, alot, off. but please, don’t push me. *sing it now!* she’s the biggest bitch in the whole wide world, bitch-bitch-bitch-bitch-bitch!
today, we went to PSA for lunch. i tried to look for Jessica’s nasi padang stall. i couldnt find it..i was like..ehh, thats not Jess, she doesnt wear a tudong…HAHA, catholic kid in a nasi padang joint! anyways, i tried the nasi padang that claudia suggested, the one ‘near the escalator’. okay, for the uninformed, i work somewhere near shenton way. but closer to the Tanjong Pagar PSA place..yeah, so IF you can visualize this place and you think there’s a coffeeshop along the long row of coffeeshops that sells bak kut teh and only nothing else, you’ve got the right one in mind.
ANYWAYS! my lunch was good, and i had a dose of COKE! wow. okay, i was really high in the office after that.. so i was yakking about compound eyes, playing on FreeRice and then proceeded to dress and organize tix.
i left at 6pm and i got home in time for dinner with the family. i was quite happy for this..now that im working, the 4 of us rarely have dinner at home.. i told them about my day and it seems like my dad knows ALOT of names i mention… it’s abit freaky sometimes.. i think it’s cos we’re dealing with his fellow industry-men. i like this refreshing layout for wordpress.. it’s abit more pro..and more sleek. okay, most of you aren’t on wordpress, so you wont know anyways..
on saturday, i think i mentioned going to brauhaus for dinner? did i? anyway, i did and that was at united square. something else happened - we stopped by Guardian to try to get shampoo supply replenished..err, okay, my family’s been using Organics (now Sunsilk) and the one with yellow packaging. i think it’s the one with egg-protein or something. why specifically that one? BECAUSE it doesnt have outrageous/essential oil additives in it. this means it works for me (meaning i wont have a terrible ITCH after showering) because when i tried something with ’soothing Camomile’, my, i almost died taking a bath. on saturday, we found out that Sunsilk has decided to improve it’s business and appeal by changing the formulae of their current range of shampoos. now the yellow one has Almond Oil in it. okay. i dont wanna try it. the others have other essential oils in them, which are hardly essential for me. i mean, wth, i just want a simple shampoo.
im resorting to SIlkpro..yes, the one on TV! hahhahaa, since it’s supposed to be SO excellent, im going to try it. and the one for Normal/Dry Scalp, mine being normal, im quite sure, having little or no strange ‘essential’ additives.. so i hope it works out.
i think for the amount i save on make-up and other beauty products, i spend for other items, most recently of course, shampoo. on a normal basis, the frikkin rice crackers i eat for breakfast (substitute for bread) and my god-damned toothpaste. wah lao. that one is really, really, expensive. WHY? cos mint is on my no-no list. soon, everything edible is going to be on it. why..it’s already halfway there!
and my frackin tinnitus also. wtf la okay?! for the uneducated..this is tinnitus according to Wikipedia..this is how big it is and how many people have the problem to varying degrees (american Tinnitus association)..and here (British Tinnitus Association)..here is a brief of what it is..and this is something more in-depth..
okay, so i want schokolade..and junk food..like tomato twisties or something..but then..im not good with any kind of junk food. tsk. wth. OKAY. the more i think of it, the more im ceasing to care and wanting to have more and more junk food!
im trying to read the economist print edition that dad subscribes to in an effort to get myself in touch with worldly happenings… i tried the online one at work, i also tried newsweek at work. guess where i ended up? THE ONION!
and specifically..
this is the Girl Test that ethel got me to do..
01. (X) I did ballet
02. ( ) I did gymnastics
03. () I paint my fingernails/toenails
04. () I have worn flip flops as anything other than beach wear
05. (X) I own clothes that are pink
06. ( ) I watch Dr Who because I fancy the Doctor (who is Dr Who??? -.-)
07. () I own hair straighteners
08. ( ) I drink alco pops (i.e. grape Smirnoffs ice, etc.)
09. () I enjoy clothes shopping
10. ( ) I keep a teddy bear on my bed
11. () I prefer high heels to flats
12. () I don’t know the “offside rule”
13. ( ) I prefer diet drinks to full calories
14. () I love bubble baths
15. () I read lifestyle magazines
16. (X) Valentine’s day is a good thing
17. () I would love to have a photo shoot
18. () I love to get dressed up
19. (X) I use a hair dryer
20. () I am scared of spiders
21. ( ) I use fake tanning products
22. (X) I can’t change a tyre
23. () I can’t change a plug
24. (X) I have thought about names for my as yet unconceived children
25. ( ) I go to the gym in preference to doing sport
26. () I see myself as fatter than I am
27. () I like to receive flowers
28. () I like things that are pretty for pretty’s sake
29. (X) I enjoy talking on the phone
30. ( ) Cushions have a point
31. ( ) I accessorize
32. () I ‘coo’ over babies
33. (x) I keep a diary
34. (X) I eat salads in restaurants
35. () I am on/have been on a diet
36. () I like chick flicks
37. ( ) I won’t leave the house without make up
38. () I enjoyed/would enjoy being a bridesmaid
39. () Weddings are romantic
40. (X) I exfoliate my skin-ive tried.
41. ( ) I have a skincare routine and stick to it religiously
42. () I sunbathe
43. ( ) Camping is wrong
44. () I like to read books that involve romance
45. (X) I have more female friends than male (in recent months, yes)
46. () I don’t like football
47. ( ) I don’t like to do any activities that may break my nails
48. ( ) I go to beauty salons
49. () I have matching underwear
50. (X) I don’t drink pints
51. () I like glitter
52. (x) I take vitamin supplements regularly
53. (X) I have read a self-help book
54. () I like going into gift shops
55. (X) Chocolate is wonderful
56. (X) I know what pilates is
57. (X) I tell my female best friend everything
58. () I own concealer
59. () I take great pride in wrapping presents well
60. ( ) I have been known to ‘flutter’ my eyelashes
61. () I always take a handbag out with me
62. ( ) I use lip balm whether I have chapped lips or not
63. () I believed in fairies
64. () I enjoyed playing with Barbie/Sindy dolls as a child
65. (X) I own more than 5 teddy bears-but not bears
66. () I own more than 10 pairs of shoes
67. () I worry about cellulite
68. ( ) I know the names of all of my friends’ children
69. ( ) The number 69 isn’t just about sex, you know..
70. (X) I have more than one hand bag - just bags…
71. ( ) I have no sense of direction
72. () It takes me longer than 30 minutes to get ready in the morning
73. ( ) I like candles
74. () My significant other expecting me to be ready to go out in 5 minutes is simply unreasonable
75. ( ) I read my horoscope
76. ( ) I read my significant other’s horoscope
77. ( ) Wearing too much black drains the colour out of me
78. ( ) I don’t do DIY
79. ( ) I use eye cream
80. () I wanted to be a princess when I was little
81. (X) Farting in front of anyone is deeply embarrassing
82. ( ) I drink 8 glasses of water a day
83. ( ) I use at least SPF15 on my face every day
84. ( ) I can’t punch
85. ( ) I get bra fitted on a regular basis
86. ( ) I dance at parties without needing to be drunk
87. (X) The ladies’ toilets have social significance
88. () I don’t like violence in films
89. ( ) I have never climbed a tree
90. () Not being able to shower every day would be unbearable
91. (X) Girls’ nights out/in are fabulous
92. (X) I wear skirts out of choice
93. () I have been referred to as ‘giggly’
94. () I like to be ‘pretty’
95. (X) Men are from Mars and women are from Venus
96. () Bakeries are a den of temptation
97. () Baby clothes are just so adorable
98. () I drink herbal tea
99. ( ) I have been known to put on a ‘girly’ voice
100.(X) I love jewellery-they’re fine!
OKAY, im 25% girl. hmm. aiight *swaggers away.
i jumped! i jumped!!
i JUMPED!!! on SMINT! OH YEAH. i dont care if it were more like hops..but yeahh…WOOHOOO! brought back memories..hahha, the last time i jumped on smint, we all know what happened, no? HA! i jumped..he didnt. and i hit the other fence. shite..i did a frikkin somersault please. ouch. BUT yesterday was GOOD!
_________
here’s uni..she obviously doesnt care about me..
so yeah. she REALLY doesnt care.
__________
If I have to let go out my dreams
Become someone I never, never thought I’d be
If that’s love then I want, I want no part
But if you’re gonna be the kind of man
Who’s willing just to take me as I am
If that’s love then you’ve got my heart
these people…
getting zonked with good friends.
fun in the sun with good friends.
and sometimes, among other things, i miss my tail.
__________
i miss photo-related things…
__________
doing stuff and having great nightly laughs with these people…
__________
i miss doing this
and making this happen.
__________
because i’ve loved.
__________
err, this past week, the people i lunch with and i have been talking about facemasks..err, this has resulted in carol donating a mask for me. it came in an envelope and err yes. popped on my table by rina. okay. i tried it tonight. i have never tried beauty products, mainly cos i get itchy and stuff..so after refrigerating THIS..
and opening it, ‘bathing’ my hands in this face mask juice from the packet (which i didnt have a choice about, it got really messy when i opened it…) without getting itchy, i tried to put it on my face. err. i dont think it worked out too well..
this is me before anything.
yes, i didnt dry my face. and after MUCH deliberation on how to put it on..this happened.
i think it was too big. AND. as a result of laughing more than anything, while trying to put it on my face without covering my eyes, i ended up almost eating a portion of the mask. *SHUT UP*. err, it didnt taste too bad..
and so with MANY glittery fingers, i finally got it on ‘properly’…yes, i know, so not. hahhaa! i look like some super hero..OR a WEIRD version of the phantom of the opera! FREAKY. i freaked my dad out on the way to my room when he came out the toilet! HAHAHAHA!
and of course i dont know what it was doing on my face..as in carol says it was supposed to be cleaning…err…im not sure..it didnt feel any different..so yeah. this is after.
i was REALLY glitttery. as a result, i asked if i was supposed to wash my face. my mom didnt know. so i typed and got instuctions to get rinsed. it was a really dubious consistency, and i decided it’d be quite fun to play with…therefore, i was squeezing it about after i took it off my face..it was fun!
and err. yeahh…
i suppose im supposed to be feeling refreshed..err..yeah..seems the same to me..
thanks for the mask carol! HAHAHA! it was fun!
